TanONg KoH, sAgOt koH
by EcKa
Habang pinagmamasdan ko ‘tong isang kumpol ng bulaklak, parang gusto kong maniwala na masarap nga magmahal. Pero ang totoo, kung gaano kasarap ang magmahal, ganoon din kasakit ang masaktan. Sabi nila patas ang lahat pag pinasok mo yang lintik na pagmamahal na yan. Dahil lahat naman tayo nagmamahal, pero bakit kailangang may nasasaktan? Sa paanong paraan naging patas ang lahat?
Sanayan nga lang ba ang labanan? Pag nasanay ka na, ganoon na lang ba kadali maglabas-masok sa relasyon? Kapag ba kabisado mo na ang pasikot-sikot wala na bang makakatinag sa dipensa mo? Pwede nga bang gawing mind games ang lahat - ang unang mainlab talo? Maaari bang isisi sa iba ang palyado nyong relasyon? Kapag may ipinaglalaban ka, mapaninindigan mo ba? Pag ba umayaw ka na, sa isang pitikan lang ok na ang isa? Sa lakas ng loob na ipinapakita mo sa umaga, di ka ba namamaluktot sa totoong kahinaan mo sa gabi?
Ang mga alaala ng nakalipas, nagagawa bang burahin ng isang bote lang? Natatakasan ba ng pagkukuwanri ang lahat? Pag ba nakahanap ka ng kapalit agad-agad, sigurado ka bang masaya ka na? Pag ba may naiwang galit sa dibdib mo, bato ka ng maituturing? Pag ba kinaya mong magsuot ng maskara sa harap ng tropa, totoo ba ang iyong mga tawa? Naisip mo bang gumanti, pero hindi mo magawa? Nagawa mo bang magalit sa taong minahal mo ng higit pa sa sarili mo? Pag ba may sumaging masasayang alaala sa isip mo, di ka ba napapangiti? Sa mga nagawang pagkakamali, di ka ba nagsisisi? Pag alam mong may nasasaktan, nakaka-usap mo ba ang iyong konsensya? Nagagawa mo pa bang kilalanin ang sarili mo??? Sino ka nga bang talaga?
Hindi ko parin magawang magalit. Yun ang totoo. Gusto kong gawing casual ang lahat. Kalimutan na parang walang nangyari. Hindi magiging madali. Aminado ako, nagkamali ako. Pero hindi pa ba sapat ang mamatay unti-unti sa harap mo? Habang namamaluktot ako’t yakap mo, naisip mo ba kung gaano kasakit? Habang halos hindi nako makapagsalita, habang tinititigan mo ko, wala ka bang nababasa sa mga mata ko? Di pa ba sapat ang mg hikbi, na halos kapusin ako ng hininga? Habang sinasabi mo sakin ang mga pinagdadaanan mong problema, sana alam mo na ayokong nasasaktan ka. Ako nalang tangina. Ako nalang! Habang hawak mo ang kamay ko, ayoko ng bumitaw. Sa bawat halik, para kong dahan-dahang pinapatay.
Di pa ba sapat ang mga luha kong pinunasan mo habang nililimos ko nalang ang atensyon mo? Di pa ba sapat ang aminin ko ang takot kong mawala ka? Di pa ba sapat na lunukin ko ang masasakit na salitang nasabi mo? Di pa ba sapat na magpikit-mata sa mga bagay na harap-harapan ng sumasampal sakin? Di pa ba sapat na sabihin kong mahal kita ng walang sawa? Di pa ba sapat na ibigay ko sayo lahat-lahat? Di pa ba sapat?! Di pa ba sapat na mahalin kita higit pa sa sarili ko?!? Di pa ba sapat?
Tang ina, hindi nga.
Uncategorized | Comment (0)Sa likod ng camera
By ecka
Sa likod ng camera,
Nagaganap ang totoong eksena
Nagkakagulo, natataranta
At pilit na itinatama ang linya.
Sa pelikula bawat mali, pwede ang take 2
Sa totoong buhay, konting mali may puna
Konting mali pwede kang pumalya
Konting mali nagmamarka sa mga nakakaeksena.
Sa pelikula, kaya mong ipakita ang daloy ng kwento,
Pero sa likod ng camera, alam ba nila kung anong totoo?
Parang ako, Sa harap n’yo masaya ko, matatag ako, kaya ko
Pero sa likod ng camera, kita nyo ba kung sino talaga ko?
Minsan iniisisip ko, kagaya mo rin kaya ako?
Pareho rin kaya tayong nagkakaganito?
May ilang katanungang naglalaro sa isip ko
Katanungang walang ibang makakasagot kundi - ako.
Sa likod ng camera, nasasaktan parin ako,
Hinahanap ko parin ang dating tayo
Sa likod ng camera, nalulungkot parin ako,
Sariwa parin ang mga salitang nakakapanlumo.
Sa likod ng camera, nagwawala parin ako
Ikaw parin ang isinisigaw ko
Sa likod ng camera, minsan naitanong ko
Hindi pa ba sapat ang mamatay unti-unti sa harap mo?
Sa likod ng camera, nangungulila parin ako
Pilit ko paring ginagaya ang yakap mo…
Sa likod ng camera, umiiyak parin ako
Sa kabila ng lahat, di ko parin magawang magalit sayo.
Sa likod ng camera, inaalala parin kita
Pinagdarasal ko parin na sana ayos ka
Sa likod ng camera, nakikita parin kita
Buhay parin ang mga alaala, panget man o maganda.
Sa likod ng camera, nagmamahal parin ako…
Pilit na sinasanay mabuhay na wala sa piling mo
Sa likod ng camera, ito ang totoong ako
Hubad ang maskarang minsa’y iniharap ko sa mga tao.
Ikaw ba sa likod rin ng camera’y nagkakaganito?
Uncategorized | Comment (1)SCREWOR-SCREWEE
BY ECKA
“Nothing is as easy as it looks. Everything takes longer than you expect. And if anything can go wrong – it will. At the worst possible moment!”
A few months later I decided it was time to let go. I realized it was about time to move on. Back then, I was bursting with love, happiness, contentment — every good thing imaginable. Everything was perfect, unless you count the petty fights and our debates.
I look back on this time and I suddenly sigh involuntarily. Life now is so different from life back then. I have learned now how to live life without your love. It wasn’t as easy as you thought it was. I had to battle with all these notions. I had to endure this emptiness inside me. I had to cry my heart out, over and over. I had to bury myself alive on the inside. I had to accept – it’s all over.
A few months ago, I had love. Now, I have only memories.
Memories that will forever be etched within, these are the ones that could somehow put up a smile on my face and the same thing that tears me up inside. Mere words cannot express how I felt for you. Well, you can just imagine how I felt after that night. Who would have guessed that it was going to end just like that? Like murder a thousand times over. It’s still here, painful as ever.
You’ve taught me a lot of things. And I owe you what I am today. I hate to be bitter after all, you know I loved you that much. I have now consciously attempt to analyze, at the outset, the price I desire. I try not to kid myself anymore. I’ve made up my mind that something is worth the price, I like to pay it and get over with. And now, like all games, this one, too, will end.
Let’s take a look back, damn it sure was the best time of my life. I am confident: I am certain. You loved me more than anything else. That I was so damn important, but the truth is I am nothing now. You might argue about that. But it hurts like hell. Like a knife stabbing at my back, cutting me open and letting it bleed relentlessly. Like fading images, as I look at our best times together, you could just imagine how I cried. Like insomnia, keeping me up all night, staring blankly in the air. Like an endless misery, hugging my pillow tight, longing for your embrace. Like guilt trip, messing me up like living in horrors of paranoia. Like a prayer, I have wished and hoped for. Like a tin can, crushed and dumped. Like a damn butterfly having a bad dream - Just like me.
Far out? Maybe. By the time you read this, I know it’s already too late. I know I’ve done wrong. And I’m deeply sorry for everything.
I have moved on. Moreover, I have let go. Of you, of me, of what once was, and of what never will be.
Hell, that was a few months ago, but today your words, and the tone in which you spoke them, still rings my ears. I cried in agony as I was wrapped around in your arms. And just like you once told me, the day we broke up, I will tell you…
“Mahal kita bhie. Minahal kita.”
Now, I shall forever let us go.
Uncategorized | Comments (2)…miss you much…
by ecka
"par! naaaning ako… "
"Huh? bakit?"
"Ewan ko, ba’t ba ko naaaning???"
"(kamot-ulo) Wag ka na kc magkakatol".
i have my own reason kung bakit ako nagkakaganito. kung bakit ako aning, kung ba’t ako paranoid. i couldn’t solve it on my own. "yung takot ko, di ko kayang mawala ng ako lang mag-isa (dapat kasama ka)". i am not blaming you for what’s happening, i am just asking for help. takot lang talaga ako. a simple hug will do. iparamdam mo lang na wala kong dapat ikatakot ok na ko.
i do not know why i’m like this. siguro kc nasanay ako na nandyan ka. na swit ka. na lagi kang nagtetext. na lagi ka tmtawag… all though, yes you still do. cguro nga hinahanap-hanap ko lang yon. da long messages before we go to sleep. the non-stop chikahans’. the mall-ikot. & the simple kulitans. and just to sum it all up. I couldn’t last a day w/o you. MISS KO NA IKAW.
di ko kayang maulit ulit yung nangyari sakin before. alam ko alam mo kung ano yung pinagdaanan ko. di ko ata kakayanin yung pain if ever it happens again. masyadong masakit. i’m willing to change. kung mali man ako, sori. give me a chance to prove myself. i just don’t want you to do some crazy sh*t. cuz i wouldn’t do such. i promise you that. mahal kta kaya ko ganto.
stay with me…. that’s all i ask.
Uncategorized | Comment (1)YOU…
I never know what tomorrow might bring. All I know now is that I HAVE YOU here with me…I was too scared to look ahead, too scared to look behind. But then again, I took the risk. For maybe this time it’s all worth it…
I don’t know how put it into words, for me to show you how I exactly felt. For the enth time, I was brave enough to conquer it all. Hoping that maybe this time it will the Last. My tears well up, for no reason I was crying. It’s a very over whelming feeling. No, not because I am hurting again or whatsoever. It’s more of what we call tears of joy. After all the hurt, now I can stand tall and scream out loud that I am happy now.
I remember the times, I was sobbing like hell. I was broken, so badly broken… I was seeking for someone’s attention. And there came YOU.
You, who didn’t even bother where I came from
You, who didn’t even mind if I was a no one
You, who were so willing to give a helping hand
You, who were so touching
You, who gives me comfort at my lowest point in life
You, who promises to give me everything for no reason
You, who annoys me at times cuz you’re pasaway
You, who cries like a kid when I ignore you
You, who begs me for kisses before going to sleep
You, who argues with me & corrects my faults
You, who disciplines all my kamalditahans’
You, who misses me that much
You, who sings me kabaduyans’ whenever we get mushy
You, who calls me at unholy hours of the day just to check me
You, who nags at me when I’m at gimmikans & inumans’
You, who were so protective
You, who makes me feel pretty
You, who makes bola every now & then
You, who makes me blush whenever you call me at the phone
You, who makes yabang with bidaman
You, who makes me feel so special, wanted, loved & blessed
YOU complete me.
And for that, I’d like to say THANK YOU with all of my heart.
I Love you, Baby…
SINGLE
By Ecka
“Shet! Single… Shet diba, shet?!?”, yan ang linya ko ngayon.
Naaalala ko kung ano ang mga nakukuha kong reaksyon galing sa mga tropa ko, natatawang nawiwirduhan na hindi maintindihan. Kahit ako natatawa sa sarili kong kaaningan. Pero ok naman, muka kong timang pero kewl. Hindi nako ganu umiiyak, pero natural nakakamis. Krung-krung nanaman ang lola mo. Ewan ko ba, basta ang alam ko lang single ako.
Nakakainggit. Pero ok lang, anu naman kung meh xota sila, iniisip ko nalang “Sa una lang yan, magbrebreak rin kayo nyan! Bwahahaha!” ang bad ko. Ayan, baka isipin nyo nanaman bitter ako… inde noh. Ok naman ang break-up eh, di ganoon kabrutal. Medyo kelangan lang ng ilang linggong kapraningan, iyakan, gyerahan, sisihan, at kung anu-ano pa. Matapos ang lahat, ‘eto kami nagsusumigaw na “SINGLE”.
Hindi ako galit sakanya, ayoko eh. Di tulad dati, pag sinabi kong galit ako meh pahabol pa yung sumpa. Ngayon indi na, walang sumpaan at barangang naganap. Tinanggap ko ng maluwag, kahit ayoko, kahit mahirap… kelangan na eh. Ouch na eh. Hindi narin ako masaya sa nangyayari samin, hindi na kasi tulad dati. Pareho na kaming takot, di na rin nya nagawang solusyonan. Wala ng ibang choice kundi ang dumistansya. Ang sakit non, pakiramdam ko meh ketong ako e. Pakiramdam ko nakakadiri ako, at kelangan meh ganong factor. Shet diba?!?
Pero kahit ganun, cge parin. Mahal mo ko, mahal kita, kaya pa! Habang lumalaban ako, bumibitaw ka na pala. Naiiwan ako sa ere ng walang kamalayan, pero ok lang cge pa… kaya pa! Hangga’t kaya ko, laban pa… kahit dapang-dapa na, kaya pa! shet dba? Shet! Todo effort ako mehn, pero parang wala lang. Di pansin. Kawawang ako, another shet!?! Masakit!!! Kulang ang salita, mura, iyak, inom, lahat! Kulang yon para iparamdam ko kung ganu kasakit mabalewala… Kahapon lang mahal mo ko, eh ngayon asan ka?
Di ko alam kung san ako nagkamali, san ako nagkulang, o kung san man ako sumobra. Ang alam ko lang kelangan natin “Magbreak”, tapos. Kasi lalayo ka, wala na… ganoon lang. Matapos ang lahat, dahil sa aalis ka tuluyan ka ng mawawala sakin. Pinilit kong balewalain yung mga rason, nagbingi-bingihan ako. Eh ano kung aalis ka, mahal kita walang magbabago @$%^(*… yun ang pananaw ko, wala akong pakelam san lupalop ka man magpunta, shet dba?!? Hindi ko naisip, ako lang pala ang nag-iisip ng ganoon. Ang iyo kasi, “You deserve someone else, I’m not the right one. Gusto ko maging ok ka na, let’s set ourselves free” … Habang isinasalba ko tayo, gumive up ka na pala. Yun nalang ang solusyon sa paglayo mo, “Break-up”.
Oo, naglet-go ako. Napagod ako. Mahirap pala lumaban mag-isa, wala kang makapitan kundi ang sarili mo. Wag mong sabihin na gumive-up lang ako basta, nakita mo kung pano ko mapraning… ilang linggo kong naulol. Ilang araw akong haggard, panget na. Halos madehydrate narin ako kakaiyak sa wala. Hindi ko malaman kung ano pang kelangan kong gawin bumalik lang tayo sa dati. Kaso wala e, ang hirap ko umintindi, sumuko ka na noon pa… diba?
Mahal mo ko, alam ko. Kaya nga masakit eh, kaya nga sobrang sakit. Masakit kasi mahal mo ko, at ramdam ko kung pano mo pigilan yang lintek na pagmamahal na yan! Ni hindi mo nagawan ng paraan, ni hindi mo kayang labanan, ni hindi mo nagawang suklian yung konting oras… Ngayon mo ipaintindi sakin mahal mo ko.
Cge pano?!?
Hindi ko magawang magalit sayo, kahit sobrang sakit. Pinili ko parin maging ok lahat, mas pinili ko kung ano yung gusto mo. Hindi kung ano yung gusto ko. Hindi ako nagdamot, basta kaya ko ibigay, cge iyo na. Kahit sobrang sakit, basta gusto mo… ibibigay ko. shet dba?!? Shet!!!
Mahal kita. Kulang na kulang ba???
Naiisip parin kita, pag meh CHER na bus, pag nadadaan ako ng MC, SM, Trinoma… pag meh magjowa, pag meh magttxt sakin, pag nagring ang fone, pag nakikita ko si “Popoy”, pag nag-aalarm yung bgay mo, kahit simpleng bagay, kahit corny, nagpapaalala sakin ng nakaraan. Hindi kasing dali ng gusto mong mangyari ang lahat, hindi isang pitikan lang OK na ako. Hindi ako robot eh. Sa totoo lang, hindi break up ang solusyon. Ikaw.
Tangina… IKAW!
Uncategorized | Comment (0)SO, I GUESS THIS REALLY IS GOODBYE…
I have no right to demand anything from you now. No right to get hurt and no right to hope. In the onset, we have made it clear already. It could’ve been fine if I didn’t jump into conclusions like you said. But believe me, I didn’t. I knew what I saw & you know exactly what I am talking about. I felt the waves of reality hit me, I desperately retreated in the shadows of denial. “Do you’re research…”, “Abante? Manila bulletin? Tonight?”, “You believed in me, but you never trusted me, change that habit, bye again”, How could I ever forget those lines? I was struck, my tears well up. You’re right, di kita kilala, hindi kita nakilala non. I don’t know whom I was talking to at that time, a very different person - a total stranger. At that time, I wanted to ask you, Where was this guy who were once mine? Si yabi asan? Mahal ako non e, hindi ikaw yan, hindi sya ganon! You made believe you were you. I hate the thought of losing this inner battle with my emotions but denial is now proving to be a useless refuge for sudden realizations and for bitter truths.
Before, I was hoping for a long lasting relationship, more so, of honest and unconditional love. It’s so sad, I never knew it was going to end up this way. I did try to forget you. Hated you, for some obvious reasons. I have tried countless times to cover it up letting go. But the toughest thing about it is that the sting lingers long after the wound has supposedly healed. And yes, I am still hurting. How I wish I could simply forget everything at an instant. But I know time does that for us. It’s still there painful as ever.
About me & my dad, mas close kami ngayon. Sobrang nagsisisi ako kung bat ganon nalang ako sumagot sakanya before. He thought me a lot of things, sobrang dami ng advice. He was my strength at that time. I remember when he saw me crying sa kusina, I opened up to him, muka kong batang inagawan ng candy. Iyak ako ng iyak. He hugged me so tight. I cried so hard as I saw him stare at his little girl, parang gusto nyang sabihin na sana sya nalang yung nasasaktan & not his unica hija. I felt my heart squeeze painfully some more. I couldn’t make myself believe that after all the things that I’ve done & all the things we’ve shared, you still chose to hurt me.
Yeah, I’m all good. Busy sa skool, sa work, sa gym… Oh, about Edward? Yah, he’s good, really nice. Hindi pa sya nanliligaw or anything. Though he’s planning to make ligaw, ayoko pa. I don’t wanna rush into things now, mahirap na. He said he’s willing to wait naman, & I’m glad he respected that. Good thing he wants to meet my family, & friends. I could see he’s sincerity. But it’s just that I’m not yet ready. I want to be fair enough to him. Ayoko naman icompare yung past relationships ko if ever. I won’t hurt him. Never.
Condolence nga pala. Hope maging ok naman papa mo & also your family.
So aalis ka na pala, ingat ka dun. I do hope you’ll be happy sa Mindanao. It’s nice to hear you’ve got your ever loyal friends with you. One-call away lang naman e, malayo man malapit din =). Now I’m not faking it, I do hope for you to be happy inspite of it all. I loved you too much Jazz, too much nagmuka akong tanga! Too much that its hurts so bad! Too much that I allowed you to hurt me through & through! That’s TOO MUCH… & I guess too much is enough.
This is not bullshit. Atleast now, you’ve got the balls to speak up for yourself. Whether it is true or not… bahala na si batman.
Nice to know you’ll be home soon. There I know you would feel so much special, loved, & wanted. Kung di ko man nabigay sayo dati yon, pasenxa na. Everything’s ok atleast. Pag balik mo seksi nako, di na kta papansinin. Joke. When you come back sana kilala mo pa ko, I do hope magkita pa tayo. By that time, all the wounds would mend & I’m sure ok nako non. Sana ikaw din.
Enough of all the hurt. I know I am talking like as if di kta nasaktan. I’m sorry for the words. I realized I have to forgive you, & to forgive myself aswell in order for us to have peace of mind & complete happiness. The pain has now become a familiar dull ache. An ache brought about by missing you so much and relieved only by memories of you & what we once had. It’s not that I regret everything… I just realized that I am no more immune to love than I am to pain. And I have to end all this, like what you wanted. I need to. We had to. I’ll miss you. You will always be a part of me yabi.
So, I guess this really is goodbye….
Sorry for everything…
Bye.
Ex.yb
Uncategorized | Comment (1)FLIMSY
By Ecka
We were ok, aren’t we? We were worth a try, don’t you think? We were happy, right? You love me, don’t you? Why do you have to leave me? Why does it have to be this way? Why does it have to end?
I feel so alone.
Maybe its not the right time, or not the right place… but I’d still like to think we were right for each other. Time was against us, against our relationship, and all we could hope for was the right time. Maybe, we’ll be together. Maybe then, I’ll give the love back, even just a little. I know I do sound pathetic. But I can’t deny, every passing day it hurts and it hurts even more. Knowing that soon, you’ll be leaving. Soon.
And now, I cherish every moment. I relish it like as if it was the last. That’s why I find it hard to part ways everytime we had to go home. I don’t want to let go of your hand. Cause it feels like it’s going to be the last…
Five years from now, I might see you again. Not as my bf, not as mushy you used to be. Not as yabi, my buddy, the one who always make inis then tells me “cute ng baby ko”. By that time, you’d be holding someone else’s hand. Cuddling, laughing, sharing, how sweet, isn’t it? I couldn’t imagine, where would I be? Holding someone else’s hand as well? Startled with what I saw or probably alone, thinking about you, and what could have been?
I wish to tell you everything. How I felt, how I’ve cried, and how many times I’ve died. But as you said, don’t get so affected with what’s happening. Don’t get so emotional cause only fools do such. How could you easily say that? Were you brave enough to handle things without the stupid me? Or were you tired enough with all these pretensions?!? I am emotionally attached. I am weakened with every single word you say. I am distressed, awfully at my lowest point in life. Wretched from all the hurt, that is happening around me. I am lost without you. I wasn’t just emotional, cause I was carried away by my feelings. That’s not it. Call me a fool, but atleast I wasn’t pretending. This is what I am feeling & this is what I am. A fool. Blinded by sentiments & all the memories I have with me. Yes, unlike you… I am fragile.
I based my emotions not by some silly quotable quotes forwarded by whoever that is. I don’t want to have any regrets on doubting, and stopping myself from loving you. I have loved you for who you are, and what you’re not. I’ve read things I shouldn’t have. I feel miserable with just simply viewing your friendster profile. The shout-outs’, comments, half meant lyrics & all. Or am I just paranoid to think it was all for me? Anyways, I don’t know where all the hindrance came from. Were you scared? Were you mad? There must be a reason… tell me. It was worth a try. I was worth a try, was I not?
###”If the person did everything for you, loved you whole heartedly, don’t ever let go of that person, for you will realize one day that this person was willing to love forever.”###
Uncategorized | Comment (1)CATCH-22
By Ecka
Jan.23, ordinary day?
I hope not.
A roller coaster ride full of happy and sad moments yet memorable. Despite the hardships, I am glad were still together and fighting for what was supposed to be ours. It’s just sad that now I am not able to greet you a Happy Monthsary. For some reasons, and it hurts so bad. But then, come to think of it, the days I’ve spent with you was a way more than a monthsary. Everyday I celebrate the chance of making you feel loved and wanted, despite all the hindrance. I’d rather not have a monthsary than a day without you.
I wish I could relieve the pain through crying. I wish sleeping could somehow take me places even for a while. Just so that I could run away from all the no-win situation. I even get a new hair cut, even if I love my hair so much. I tried eating but the food don’t taste that good, even drinking ain’t doing what it should. I’m a hazard to myself.
Fighting a war against the mirror somehow takes the edge off of me. I blame myself for nothing, knowing nothing at all. So fed-up with what was happening. I couldn’t understand why all of a sudden things’ has to change. Maybe I’m still hoping? Or maybe I just don’t want to let go?
Maybe then I’ll understand…
Maybe then all the hurt would mend…
Maybe then I’ll see it’s purpose…
Maybe… then…
####Catch-22 - a situation in which whatever outcome somebody desires is impossible to attain because the rules always work against it.####
Uncategorized | Comment (1)Mi Raison d’être
By Ecka360
I do not know how to sum up my feelings. All I know is that everyday hurts like hell. I was cramming out of time, that I have to meet my deadline. I have to accept the fact that sooner or later, you’ll be gone. You’ll be leaving… And I don’t have the assurance that you’d come back. Do you know how it feels to let go when you know deep down inside, your heart is saying no? But then I have to. And it’s killing me, every inch of me.
I know how much you love me. But it hurts knowing that you have to do such things. I could feel your pain. Cuz your pain is my pain. Hush now, baby don’t cry… I will let you unnerve me for awhile. Conk out your fears to me, let me carry all the hurt inside you. You have no idea how much it gets harder each day. Every minute of everyday, every second flies by into my hands. And soon you’ll be gone, out of my life. I may not have enough reason for you stay but just let me… just let me give you reasons not to go. I need you here with me. I need you so bad…
Who’s gonna pick me up? Who’s gonna call me up at night? Who’s gonna be my date? Who’s gonna carry my bag? Who’s gonna watch movie with me? Who’s gonna text me? Who’s gonna argue with me? Who’s gonna make me laugh? Who’s gonna make me cry? Who’s gonna make me feel pretty? Who’s gonna comfort me? Who’s gonna hold my hand? Who’s gonna hug me? Kis me?… Now, who’s gonna tell me I love you back?
These are just some of the questions running inside my head. Simple questions that only I myself could answer. For I know, until now… it’s you, only You.
I miss you everyday… and I miss you even more… ;-(
As tears run down my face, everything flashed back clearly. From the very first day, up to the day when I last saw you. How much I wanted to stop the clock from ticking, just so that I could spend more time with you. How I longed for your cuddles, and sweet nothings. Damn! I miss you. I wish I could tell you how much you mean to me… but words are not enough. . I wish that you could stay but… But more than this I wish you could’ve seen my face. In a phrase to cut these lips, I love you.
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